"If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me."
When I was shattered and alone, feeling ashamed and dark, and all my lovers had left me...he was still there. This mysterious man on a valiant white horse always whispering to me...
"Beloved...take my hand...follow me...I will fulfill you...I will protect, value, and love you...please be mine."
He was amazing at soothing my soul and taking away all my fears and filling me with peace. But, what if he hurts me like all the other guys with their cunning words and manipulative behavior?
SOMETHING ABOUT THIS MAN WAS DIFFERENT. He was trustworthy, it was written all over his face. He had purity in his eyes, his voice brought peace. A love I never knew saturated my soul at the very glance of his eyes. I saw fire. He moved me to tears when he would say my name. He was perfect, I couldn't find a single fault.
Could this be the love I had been searching for my whole life???
All of a sudden, my spirit was taken to a different scene and I was standing on a hill looking at this same man, but this time he was hanging on a cross, nails through his hands and feet, bleeding, bruised, and disfigured. There on his face was the same passion and love I had seen before. What was it about this man that stirred my heart? On his head was a crown of thorns and above the cross it read...
"King of the Jews"
What mockery! Who would do such a horrible thing to this man who treated me with gentle kindness? He acted more like a king than any man I had ever met. He carried incredible authority. Why hadn't he fought back when they did this to him?
I was beginning to realize this was no ordinary man. This was a man with supernatural supremacy, a man whose love was birthing a change in me and breaking down the walls I had built up around my heart. As I stood before him, I began to cry. I couldn't comprehend why my new friend was dying before my very eyes and why there was nothing I could do about it.
"WHY...I don't understand", I said under my breath.
"Beautiful one, I did this for you. I died so you could live. Though your sins were many, from this day forward you are washed white as snow. I was pierced for your rebellion, crushed for your sin. I was beaten so you could be whole. I was whipped so you could be healed. I came so you could have a relationship with my Father. I purchased your freedom with my own blood. I am in love with you...you have captured my heart. Will you surrender your life to me? Will you lose your life, so you can gain it in me?"
"Yes, yes I will! You're worthy of it all, but who exactly are you?"
And with his last breath he proclaimed...
"I am Jesus, the son of God. The Beginning and the End. I am the One who is, who always was, and who is still to come, It is finished."
Wow! Jesus! The Son of God. I had heard his name before, but nobody told me is was THIS awesome!!! Nobody told me he was THIS personal and that HE LOVED ME THIS much! I had FINALLY found a love that I knew would quench me for the rest of my life. And, to think I captured His heart, even when I was stuck in my sin. I wanted to know everything about this man, Jesus. I was falling head over heels, He had won my heart. He even called me His bride. My life would never be the same. I had encountered a love like no other, a love that consumed my every thought and action.
If only I found Jesus sooner it would have saved me from so much heartache, but no looking back now!
I was ready to set out on an adventure with Jesus, His Father, and Holy Spirit! I don't just get one...I GET ALL THREE!!!
Now, as I've been walking, talking, living, breathing, dancing, and singing with Jesus the past 3 years, I still feel like a new born baby. I'm constantly being undone by new revelations of who God is and His unfailing, unconditional love blows me away daily. Every day I wake up and fall in love with Jesus like it's the first time I met Him. His faithfulness never ceases to amaze me and he's a blast. I love the Holy Spirit, He makes life exciting and spontaneous.
Jesus Christ who gave His life for me is a beautiful, sacrificial lover who is searching for those who will lay down their lives for the sake of loving and following Him. He pursues His children like a man in the desert pursues water. He truly is better than anything this world has to offer us.
I want everyone to fall in love with Jesus.